The more I think about it, the more I get to the conclusion that my problem is capitalism, actually. I have a high standard towards my own work and I prefer to dig deep, understand the full scope and thrive in executing tasks in the best possible way. But quality takes over quantity, and in a World where KPIs and SLAs rule, that’s not a lucky position.

It’s not that I don’t see the tricks and shortcuts. It’s my work ethic that stops me from playing games. I am not a politician. I am thorough, honest and persistent. Translating it to modern language: I am not easy to manage, as I don’t fit to the pre-cut frames.

Sometimes I am questioning if keeping myself to my work morals make sense. It would be easier not to care so much. To only do the least that’s expected. To not think about further complications throughout the big picture. To not have to explain my results.

But I can’t be someone else. So I work hard. I care. I get exhausted and sometimes lose my motivation temporarily. Yet with the way I work I feel like I can be proud of myself and the things I achieve. (Even if sometimes I’m the only one applauding myself.)
After all, our whole life is an illusion. Everyone has a different story and it would be naive to expect that anyone else could see my story from the same perspective I have.
I remain my own judge.

Martin Roth – An Analog Guy In a Digital World